I have a major problem with what’s been unfolding between Dean and Davina on this year’s Married at First Sight (or MAFS, as I learnt last night…). If the title didn’t give my stance away, I can tell you I’m pretty salty about the way these two have behaved.
People go on this show, presumably, to find love. They go through testing and questioning and observation by psychologists and are said to be paired with their “perfect match” (out of the pool of applicants that have been selected who will guarantee good screen time and high ratings, right?). Having taken it all into account, Dean was paired with Tracey, and Ryan was paired with Davina.
I’d just like to take a minute here to acknowledge the fact that whatever these people have been doing so far, whoever they’ve been dating, what ever ‘type’ they’ve been attracted too… it obviously hasn’t worked out so well as yet, has it? So… despite their initial outrage, maybe the fact that these people were paired with people ‘they wouldn’t normally go for’ isn’t a *bad* thing at all.. Maybe what you ‘usually go for’ just isn’t what you *need* in a partner… so you would THINK that these people would have a bit of an open mind… and commit to the time they’ve agreed to be on this ridiculous (but intensely addictive) TV ‘experiment’.
The back story
I’m not an idiot. I’m sure this situation was manipulated and edited to look even worse than it was… but the facts are simple – these words came out of their mouths at some point, and they behaved in this manner at some point.
To quickly catch you up to speed… I’m talking about the fact that after the first cocktail party Davina and Dean magically had each other’s numbers (I didn’t see this, so I’m going to give them the benefit of this doubt by suggesting numbers were exchanged by producers who were keen to catch the fireworks that were guaranteed to ensue from this situation). They were madly texting each other, back and forth, in front of their partners; and this was the first point I felt sick. How innocent they seemed, tapping off on their phones – until their perspective partners go back to watch this footage and realise who exactly they were messaging… and this is how easily trust is broken now for all the partners that come after.
They organise a sneaky rendezvous where they cannot keep their hands off each other and whilst they don’t actually kiss (on camera) they say how turned on they are by each other and how much they would rather pursue this relationship, that their current ones. This betrayal continues when they both go home and lie about where they’ve been and who they’ve been with. The final straw for me that make me throw my popcorn at the TV was when they left the cocktail party, leaving their partners at the table, sneaking off to get all handsy and promising each other they would leave their partners to give it a go. They slink back in like the shady fuckers they are, and continue flirting under their breath with their partners sitting mere centimetres away.
Now that I’ve swallowed my own vomit. I’ll continue.
Why Davina broke the girl power code
Not even sure where to start with this one. It’s the most important code, I think… If girls don’t have each other’s back… then we’re kind of all fucked right?
I define cheating as: Any behaviour that you would not feel comfortable doing in front of your partner. This includes messaging in private, touching, uttering provocative statements. If you wouldn’t do it with your partner standing next to you – you’re cheating. In my opinion.
Not only was Davina being a total sneaky bitch, but then she decide it would be ok for her to mosey on up to Tracey and literally rub the poor bitch’s face in it. She told Tracey straight to her face how much she respected her and got on with her and how she just felt like Trace deserved better than old Dean-o (probably the only true thing that came out of her mouth). Firstly – WHAT THE FUCK?! How do you sleep at night girl!? Not only are you stealing her man, but you’re feeding her bullshit about respect?! You obviously don’t respect her – you’re trying to shag her hubby… and I feel like you obviously don’t even know the meaning of the word as you’re not respecting *anyone* in this situation; including yourself.
My real issue with Davina
Davina keeps saying how she’s just putting herself first. I genuinely don’t have a problem with that – in fact I highly recommend it, I’ve put myself first a lot lately, and it feels great… but there’s definitely ways to do that without being a complete fucking moll. Ways like telling your husband that you’re just not that into him *before* you initiate a new fling on the side. Maybe you can put yourself first *without* cozying up to Trace so that when she watches the videos back she doesn’t feel like a complete idiot and have trust issues with other females for the rest of her existence. I’m not expert (as I said, I’m new to this whole “gonna put myself first” thing) but they’re just a few ideas I brainstormed about how to put yourself first without being a complete fuck wit.
My other problem with Davina is – THANKS FOR RUINING ANOTHER DECENT GUY. Ryan, for all his faults, seems like an average decent bloke. Hey, I’m sure he’s not perfect – but jeeze, neither am I. Thanks to this circus, it would be a miracle if he didn’t come out the other end without any major trust issues – and without 59 kilos of extra baggage. Women like Davina give girls a bad name… I don’t have a problem with going for what you want – I’m actually ALL ABOUT IT… but just be a decent human along the way. The next poor bitch who dates Ryan is going to have a hard time proving herself, and surely would have to pick up some broken pieces after this.
Why Dean’s a douche
Where do I actually start? Apart from the fact that he’s a rapping skateboarder, how he has played both this women is absolutely disgraceful.
My question to Tracey (who must have been having an aneurism when she decided to give him another chance) is this: if he’s willing to behave in this way, and disrespect you like this, on *National* television… what the fuck is he going to get up to when there’s no one there to witness his shenanigans? Huh?! HUH!?
I’m not going to say he behaved like a typical *guy* but, as many people do, he thought the grasser was greener (read: fitter, tighter, younger, sexier – by his own admissions) on the other side… and didn’t think twice about who he’d have to step on to jump over that fence.
And to really solidify his fuckknob status – he makes a dig at the already self conscious Tracey by saying to Davina “her looks are definitely not her strong point” – um… are you fucked in the head!? Again, like Davina, how can anyone ever trust you again, after you’ve proved what a great liar you are.
And to turn around at the commitment ceremony and then burn Davina?! What a dip shit – I just can’t even.
And can we not forget Ryan, please
All I have to say is: poor bastard. And… poor girl that will come after Davina – whoever you may be. So much baggage. So many trust issues. Such a shame. So unnecessary.
And the fact that he had written ‘stay’ and had to put up with this devil woman for an extra week, and not only put up with her, but tolerate her trying to win him back after she was burnt by Dean… what a legend… He’s going to be beating girls off with a bat once he leaves that hell.
Why Tracey made a mistake
I’m not Tracey, I don’t know Tracey, I can’t imagine how Tracey feels (I have been cheated on, but never publicly on National Television). *But* if Tracey was my girlfriend I’d be telling her she made a big mistake. Huge.
Obviously she’s embarrassed. She’ll be even more mortified when she watches this all unfold on TV and discovers the truth of what that snake was hiding. But to me, it just feels like she doesn’t know that she deserves more, and deserves better… and that makes me a bit sad. Yes, she said that you don’t just quit a marriage – but I personally would NEVER EVER forgive cheating… because the trust would be broken, and knowing myself, it would take such a long time to build that back. I would doubt everything, be second guessing everything and my mind would be constantly racing – and that would be hell.
The thing that makes me the saddest is that she has a daughter and is setting a bit of an example to her child about this kind of behaviour being ok. Maybe I’ve got to that point where I have too little forgiveness… but if that was me… Bye Felecia.
I genuinely wish the best for Tracey and I hope it works out for her sake. She seems like a lovely woman and she deserves happiness (we all do – except Dean and Davina) and like I said, I don’t know her or her back story – so I’m sure she’s stayed for a reason… and I just hope it all works out for her.
But I doubt it will. *mark these words*
How this would have played out in real life
- Dean would have promised Davina the world, Davina would have promised Dean the best sex of his life – Dean would have got a boner and decided instantly to leave Trace
- Tracey would have wised up either by accidentally stumbling across a message or hearing whispers through the grapevine
- Tracey would have slapped Davina (maybe that’s just me – but she would have definitely gone on some abusive rampage via text or phone call) for being a two-faced skank and having the audacity to comfort her about her shaky relationship and spin shit to her face about having such immense respect for her
- Neither girl would have known the truth because they never would have been in a situation like ‘the commitment ceremony’ in reality – so Dean could have continued to spin it whichever way her needed to to absolve himself of any responsibility
I can’t wait to see how this pans out. But I would love to see Dean end up with Mrs Palmer at the end. I don’t know what will happen, but even though Dean and Davina probably deserve each other as two fellow scum bags, I’m not sure that will be the case.
In time, however, I’m pretty certain that Dean and Tracey won’t go the distance. I’m no expert but…. that kind of behaviour is hard enough to forgive, but impossible to forget.